Dear Wedding Vendors,

I would say it’s not you it’s us, but in reality, there were some things you could have done differently while we were searching for vendors. Being part of a couple that looks heterosexual but is actually queer has presented its share of interesting experiences while we were searching for the perfect team to help make our wedding possible. So let’s break it down shall we? You deserve to know why we and maybe other queer clients didn’t reach out, or why we declined your services…

Representation of Queer Clients

You might not have even received an inquiry from us because of the lack of representation on your website and social media. How are we to trust you with our big day if we don’t know if you’ve even ever worked with LGBTQ+ clients? We get it, everyone starts somewhere, but for us, we passed on any vendors that weren’t showing diversity, not just with sexuality but race, religion, and size too. The wedding industry has plenty of thin white heterosexual couples, but finding someone who looks like us was really important, especially for photography. As much as we love hearing how much you love to travel, or how many cups of coffee you drink, your social media presence can be used to attract queer couples instead. The vendors we hired with strong instagram’s had a variety of images in their feed that showed lots of people from all backgrounds. It’s simple, but will bring you clients like us who are looking for more representation. Just by adding diversity to your portfolio you can reach out to clients you didn’t even realize you were missing out on.

Inclusive Language

I can’t tell you how many websites I exited out of when I saw only the words “bride and groom” when referring to a wedding couple. Don’t assume that everyone who’s looking for wedding services is part of a male and female couple. The wedding world is saturated with heteronormative traditions and for us queer couples, breaking that tradition is important. Even when posting advertisements in wedding facebook groups saying “hey brides!” cuts out half of the population. This goes for the vendors who responded to my emails saying “future husband” without knowing my partner and assuming I’m marrying a man. There are few things that will get a queer couple more fired up than having their partner’s gender assumed. Simple changes like saying lovebirds, partners, beloved, awesome person, etc. will attract couples who don’t just fit into the stereotypical idea of who gets married. That inclusive language should carry over into contracts, invoices, emails, and the day of. Being mindful of your language can make the difference between an affirming experience and one that leaves a queer couple feeling unsafe.

Who You Support

Story time! I had headshots and branding photos taken a few years ago. During the session the photographer told me she was interested in working with more LGBTQ+ folks. A week after getting the photos I saw that her work was being published by a blatantly homophobic wedding publication, Wedding Pioneer. They have said in plain language that they will not showcase same sex couples in their publication and social media. I reached out to her letting her know their policies and how that would reflect badly on her business when it comes to future LGBT+ clients. Instead of taking that information and retracting her partnership with them, she said she didn’t care because they were getting her images in front of thousands of people that would make her money. The people and companies you support reflect back on you and your business. After some appalling statements and back and forth  I told her to remove my images from her website and social media and that I would not be working with her or referring her in the future. It is one thing to be unaware of bad policies but when a queer person tells you that what you are doing is harmful to the community it isn’t up to you to decide it’s not. Queer couples can see through the smoke and mirrors and can tell when you’re being inclusive for money or if you’re truly being an ally.

It’s all in the Details

This should go without saying but make sure you are spelling names correctly and replying in a prompt manner. We straight up didn’t hear back from SO many vendors, like do y’all not want our money?? Couples will not chase you down, you need to follow up and be prompt with your emails. Of course life happens, but it’s one of the easiest ways to keep clients interested and ready to shell over the big bucks. Same goes for spelling, my name is Liv, not Liz. It may be autocorrect but checking your spelling specifically on names is a good practice for everyone. It just goes to show that you are a real person and not just sending an auto response which feels impersonal and left us searching for someone else.

Wrapping it Up

All of these things are simple steps to becoming more inclusive. It doesn’t take a ton of time but will make a huge difference especially to LGBTQ+ couple and folks looking for vendors. We passed on probably 25-30 vendors simply because they didn’t stand out as being queer friendly. If we felt this way then I KNOW more couples have had the same experiences. It’s opened my eyes to ways that I can be a better business owner myself. Just because I’m queer myself doesn’t mean that I know every single thing there is to know and I’m always growing. One of the things I decided to do after having so many negative vendor experiences was to create my workshop all about teaching photographers how to better serve LGBTQ clients. I go into detail about how to navigate pronouns, gender neutral language, translating that to social media and websites, and tons more. I’ve put in hours and hours of time into laying out a step by step road map to success in this area. You are literally missing out on thousands of dollars by not educating yourself on how to be a better photographer and vendor to queer clients. It’s been such an eye opening experience while planning the wedding to see the gaps where people are lacking. Even vendors who claim to be queer friendly have things they can improve on! If you’re a photographer and want to grow in that area I highly recommend checking out the course here!

So….did you realize you have some work to do? Focus on representing a diverse client base not just on your website but social media as well. Take the time to make your website and own personal language more gender neutral. It will show queer clients, especially non binary and trans clients, that you are a safe person to work with. Remember that the companies, websites, and people you support reflect back on you and your business so doing your due diligence to make sure they are inclusive is also important. Lastly, don’t forget the little details, spelling people’s names properly, responding promptly, and not assuming gender can make the difference between someone hiring you or not. If you want to take the easy route and have me teach you how to make these changes step by step you have to check out the online workshop. 10 easy to digest modules that will take you from not having any queer clients to not being able to keep up with all the inquiries! There is so much that the wedding industry can improve on and I’m happy we’ve been moving in the right direction. Now it’s up to everyone to do their part to continue this path to change!

Want in on all the juicy details? Check it out!

THE INCLUSIVITY WORKSHOP

Chelsea and Ben enjoyed the most beautiful and personal day for their wedding. The two are both singers, their passion for music and community shined throughout the whole day. We were able to get some amazing shots on the rooftop of their hotel before moving to their venue, Lions and Rabbits, and incredible wedding venue and art space in the Creston neighborhood of Grand Rapids. Their wedding party wore stunning jewel tones that paired perfectly with the eclectic art on the walls. Guests were greeted with a champagne toast before they gathered to witness the couple officially marry. It was beautiful to see all their friends and family who were a part of the ceremony sharing their love. After their first dance guests enjoyed a variety of food stations which made for a really lovely casual atmosphere perfect for mingling. It was such an honor to be a part of their wedding, it’s definitely one of the most special I’ve attended. As you can clearly see from the photos Chelsea and Ben were made for each other and I know they will have years of happiness to come.

Check out the blog posts linked below to see more from Grand Rapids Wedding Photographer, Liv Lyszyk Photography

Gabby and Moe | Leland Art Center | Up North LGBTQ Wedding Photographer

Liz and Dan | Grand Rapids, MI | Grand Rapids Wedding Photographer

Hollis and Kenny | Grand Rapids, MI | Grand Rapids Engagement Photographer

Lily and Jake are as stylish as they are talented. Both are opera singers in Florida and Lily is currently working on her doctorate. INCREDIBLE! The two are marrying here in Grand Rapids next May and I’m so excited for it! We met up this last fall for their engagement session while they visited to do some wedding planning. I absolutely love when couples get dressy and a little more formal for their photos. I mean just look at that incredible black dress and his pink suit jacket. We had a blast exploring some of what downtown has to offer! Lily and Jake are such kind hearted folks and I’m so happy to be their photographer!

To see more from Liv Lyszyk Photography check out the blog posts below!

Hollis and Kenny | Grand Rapids, MI | Grand Rapids Engagement Photographer

Gabby and Moe | Leland Art Center | Up North LGBTQ Wedding Photographer

Day and Herman | Grand Rapids, MI | Grand Rapids Engagement Photographer

Gabby and Moe are two of the kindest, most incredible humans I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing. These two wanted an intimate celebration of love and diversity. The pair got ready at an incredible summer resort, very dirty dancing vibes! We ate sandwiches while everyone slowly got ready and just enjoyed everyone’s company. It was such a joy to experience everyone’s beautiful energy and love towards the couple. They did a beautiful first look and exchanged gifts before we meandered around the property for photos. Heading to the ceremony and reception space it was great to see the buzz of last minute details being finalized. A huge part of their wedding was activism and inclusion. They offered pronoun buttons for folks to wear to create a safe space for community and also offered all gender neutral bathrooms. It was so lovely seeing the personal touches added throughout the whole day. I think the photos speak for themselves, so just enjoy!

To learn more and see more of Liv’s work check out the links below!

Jasmine and Cady // West Michigan // LGBT Engagement Photography

Ashlee and Allison | West Olive, MI | LGBT Wedding Photographer

Dan and Paul | Stetson Chapel | LGBT Wedding Photographer

 

Hey y’all! I’ve had a lot of interest in what my fave beauty products have been! I’ve been diving into makeup and skincare a bit more as a way to focus on myself and feel good! These items are some of my tried and true favorites that I always go back to. Obviously I have different skin needs than some people, I tend to be a little on the dry side so moisture is a huge thing for me. These items will link to Amazon if you’re interested in trying them for yourself!

This Pacifica serum is AMAZING! It’s scent is subtle but it adds a touch of glow while making me feel super hydrated! The texture is more of a gel than a serum but a little goes a long way! I love this brand especially because everything they have is vegan and cruelty free which is an added bonus.

Simple brand is another go to for skincare that feels good. These wipes are more refreshing than makeup removing but I love throwing some in my bag especially on trips to feel clean and fresh. There’s a slight clean scent but I don’t think it would be enough to irritate sensitive skin.

These are my GO TO makeup removing wipes. A ton of people in the beauty community swear by them and I totally get why. They aren’t super expensive and I always have them on hand in my makeup station. These ones remove better than the simple ones listed above, both are great but serve different purposes.

Ecotools hands down has the best and sturdiest brushes I’ve used. They used to have a duo brush set that was for eyeshadows, this set has the same brushes just individually. I love that they are made of bamboo and the quality of the brush hairs themselves is super nice.

I’m a face mask lover! This value pack has tons of really neat formulas and is really inexpensive. I also usually send these to clients to spoil them before the wedding too! Everyone loves a good face mask and they make great quick gifts to have on hand too!

This is like the weirdest thing on the list but truly it works! I have SUPER thick hair, so thick that every single time I get my hair cut the stylist is shocked. I have thick hair but also a ton of it, so a sturdy detangling brush is necessary. This one for whatever reason works perfect and is easy to clean too.

Mirrors can be pricey but honestly it’s a game changer. I do my makeup and skincare routines at my office desk so this type of mirror is super needed. The light is helpful and having a way to get close up is great!

Like I said my skin is dry so when I went into a beauty store this spring they suggested this one. I love how well it soaks in and just feels like a drink for my face. It lasts a super long time too, I’m just now finishing up my first jar from April. If you are looking for one step skincare I can’t recommend this enough!

Keeping my stuff organized is key especially because I do all my beauty stuff in my office. This organizer stores all of my nail stuff which surprisingly is a lot of stuff! I like that it’s see through too so it’s easy to grab what I need quickly.

Speaking of organizing, a tiered cart has changed everything for me in terms of convenience.  This isn’t the exact one I have but is really similar. I’m able to leave my makeup stuff all organized next to my desk and then pull it beside me when I’m actually getting ready. Similar to the nail organizer above it’s nice because I can see everything I need and grab it.

This isn’t a complete list but just some of my go to items I can’t live without. It’s taken a little experimenting to see what works for me but all of these things work together to make me feel put together and pampered for relatively cheap! I hope you’re able to find some new faves out of these things and would love to hear what works for you!

Ellie and Martín have such a beautiful relationship that I was honored to photograph. Their wedding, held at Boatwerks Restaurant in Holland, Michigan was a perfect blend of their cultures and love for each other. Ellie told me they wanted it to feel like a tropical getaway without the destination wedding price. I think they did a stunning job, thanks in part to the gorgeous florals from Stems Market. I loved the modern fiesta vibe and the bright colors paired with neutral backdrops to create a fun environment. It was such a joy to witness and capture their nuptials and I’m so eager to see how they grow together in the future!

Julia and Robert were referred to me by a dear friend who thought my style and personality would mesh well with theirs. Well they were right and during Julia and Robert’s engagement session we hit it off. We had chatted back then about the woodland ethereal feel the couple wanted for their day. I knew it would be incredible and they didn’t disappoint. The florals that dripped from every inch of the setup from Brennan at Overgrowth Floral were so dreamy. I mean take a look at that completely handmade arch! I loved the elevated backyard feel that the venue and their personal touches gave. I’m just so giddy with how everything turned out and I got some pretty kick ass friends out of it!

 

Dajanae and Herman celebrated their love with their closest friends and family at the Bissell Treehouse. It was so inspiring seeing their friends share stories of how much the couple had impacted their lives. From the beginning Dajanae said this was not just a wedding, but a thank you, to everyone in their lives. That mindset was clear throughout the whole day. I was blown away by the florals and how perfectly their vision came to life! It’s pretty clear to see just how much these two love each other, it was such a fun time!

To learn more and book Liv for your wedding check out the website or the blog posts linked below!

Ashlee and Allison | West Olive, MI | LGBT Wedding Photographer

Day and Herman | Grand Rapids, MI | Grand Rapids Engagement Photographer

Josh and Ashley | Meijer Gardens, MI | Grand Rapids Elopement Photographer

I knew Katrina when I was in middle school, we had met through a mutual friend (the maid of honor!) and when she and Sasha reached out years later about photographing their Loft 310 wedding I was SO pumped. I absolutely love connecting with couples that I know and getting to capture their love. It was clear when we me up for their Engagement Session that their wedding would be spectacular and they totally didn’t disappoint. Loft 310 is a great venue, the best in Kalamazoo I think. They offer such gorgeous spaces to allow couples to really cater their wedding to their personal taste. I loved that these two didn’t feel obligated to do any traditions they didn’t want. It just felt like a huge celebration of love and friendship. Sasha and Katrina are a perfect pair and their big day matched that perfection, thank you for allowing me to be there to capture it!

To learn more and see more of Liv Lyszyk Photography’s work check out the blog posts below or go to the website!

Ashlee and Allison | West Olive, MI | LGBT Wedding Photographer

Nikki and Carolyn | Delton, MI | Queer Wedding Photographer

Hollis and Kenny | Grand Rapids, MI | Grand Rapids Engagement Photographer

 

I did it! I failed. I went from 24 weddings in 2018 to 19 for this season. My goal was 20 and I failed. So what happened when I didn’t reach my goal? Not much. To be honest I kind of expected my career to fall apart and the world to crumble around me. But you know what? My career is still there and I’m doing ok.

I’m a goal setter. Each year in my off season I look at my books from the previous year and plan out how I want to do even better. My goal for 2019 was 20 weddings. A goal I thought would be hit by the end of January, but here we are half way through the season still at 19. I think part of why the number 20 was so stuck in my head is the fact that the number of weddings each year is a benchmark for my success. When people who don’t understand the full scope of wedding photography ask about my job the first question is “how many weddings do you have this year?” And I think no matter what that number is people would still be impressed. But, when it comes to the photography community, which can be pretty cutthroat, that number feels small.

So how did I come to be ok with my perceived disaster. I thought about the 19 couples who trusted me. Who chose me. Who are allowing me to be a huge part of shaping their legacy during an important time in their lives. Those 19 couples don’t give a shit how many weddings I have. In fact, having fewer weddings coupled with going full time allows me to invest my time and energy even more into helping them plan their days. I also thought about little Liv. How proud she would be of me, pushing through all the bullshit that made her question if she would even be around to have a career.

Our society is built on hustle. It’s long work weeks, no time off, letting ourselves go uncared for in the name of success. When did it become a bragging right to say you take no days off? I’ve built my career around the life I want to live. Because of my career I’m able to go on vacations with my partner, I’m able to be at home to care for our pets, I’m able to grab coffee with a friend and not miss out on my payday. I’ve been able to take the time to focus on my physical and mental health more. The things I’ve gained from this career, and specifically this year, are not measurable by numbers. It’s the things I’ve gained from my friendships and relationship that truly mark my success.

I know that this year and that goal won’t be the only one I perceive as failure. Life is all about seasons, and without this season of “failure” I wouldn’t be working so hard on making myself better. We can’t fault ourselves for doing the best we can with the resources we have. So take it from me, failures aren’t really failures, they are opportunities to learn and grow. I’m glad I failed.